• Publication: 2014 ROTA Books
• Format: trade paperback, ebook
• Type: holiday thriller
• ISBN: 978-163023-005-0
• File Under: holiday stories for grownups, reindeer games
Rudolph! is a first-person account of the behind the scenes workings at the North Pole. Narrated by Bernard Rosewood, one of the elves of the North Pole Consortium, the story begins with Santa’s realization that a young girl’s holiday request of getting her dad back for Christmas isn’t going to happen. Dad, you see, died in a car accident on a snowy road shortly after Thanksgiving. The NPC can do a lot, but they can’t do miracles.
Enter Rudolph, who has been hairless, cranky, and perpetually irradiated since the unfortunate malfunction of the Nuclear Clock in 1964. Rudolph is a survivor of the worst accident in the four hundred plus years of NPC delivery, and if there is anyone on staff who believes in miracles more than jolly St. Nick, it’s Rudolph. Bernie, in a valiant effort to keep Christmas from going off the rails, is swept up into a Heaven-storming, Hell-crusading, Night of Bad Musical Numbers adventure to ensure that every child wakes up with presents on Christmas Morning. Rudolph! is a funny and fast-paced reaction to fifty years of world-weary cynicism, technological advances, and post-millennial ennui since Rankin & Bass brought a stop motion reindeer into our living rooms.
“Rudolph! is a weird, wild, ridiculous ride through a funhouse mirror version of Christmas folklore . . . If you think you’re over Christmas stories, Rudolph! makes a compelling argument to the contrary.”
—Lit Reactor [B. H. Shepherd]
“[Teppo] creates a complex situation, building on his previous novelette ‘A Christmas Wish (Redux)’ and using Mandelbrot, Dante, and Shakespeare as a roadmap through the afterlife and the fallout of the team’s journey.”
“This book is the perfect antidote for All The Bad Things”
—Kristene Perron, Kung Fu Nurse and co-author of WarpWorld